sent in by David As a young man this Christian doctrine was forced on me like it was forced on many others. I was lead to believe that if you did not bow down to Jesus that you would forever burn in hell. But, they did not explain that while Jesus may have lived at some point that his teachings were twisted by other men and then in order to stay in a position of power over others they made these magical stories of Jesus walking on water and being raised from the dead. They have forced fed this crap onto us for far to long. They use this teacher as a way to murder millions or to force these same millions into servitude to the leader. The Catholics used the inquisitions to further their hold when people did not believe in what they had to say they killed them and with few non-believers around this helped to spread their disease. I was able to break loose after reading many books by different scientists and finding that one there is no possible way that the Earth could be only 6,00

sent in by Lynn D. Ellis I will not submit to the intimidation of those who claim any theories, ideas, or philosophies about the nature of reality are exclusively their own institutionalized domain - whether theological or quasi scientific. I will not be governed by the mind police who believe themselves to be inherently correct in the positions they hold. I choose to think and reason unencumbered of their supposed "enlightened" views. I will not be dominated by political correctness so that my own personally held beliefs must first filter through the threshold of sequestered thoughts and ideas held captive by the credentialed power mongers. I will not be manipulated, handled, or made to fit a social paradigm that continues to reinforce its own self-made image of intrinsic superiority. Many fail to recognize there may never be a philosophy, idea, religious tenet or dogma, scientific theory, or even a societal anomaly that will not be ultimately proven false. The entire Unive

sent in by Cindy I was raised in a strict Southern Baptist family. Being Baptists they of course had very stanch views on everything, nothing escaped the judging eyes of their religion. Not even my personal issues were safe from their prying eyes. As a result I gladly strayed from the church and my views changed dramatically. I attended church like a good little girl every Sunday. I prayed, listened to Christian music, and did missionary work. Every Sunday I would listen gratefully to the sermons and feel like that was the absolute truth. There was one sermon in particular that really stuck with me. The sermon was about the "Evils" of homosexuality and how they are "Sinners" and deserve the "Fires of Hell." This sermon stuck with me in such a way that it made me fear the homosexual lifestyle. I refused to befriend them or to even acknowledge them. I practically hated them and their sin. To my dismay one Sunday I was sitting in church minding my own when a

sent in by Lisa I'm so glad to have found this site. I'm at that newly-deconverted, lonely stage; although husband of 27 years and two teenage children deconverted with me. Turns out the kids were having more questions than I was. We were even "elite" Christians - "come-outers" who left the organized church system in favor of home meetings - where the "Spirit" flowed freely and no person was in charge. We stopped believing in hell years ago; favored "universalism", or salvation for all. But through difficult circumstances I began to have more questions than answers. God never answered my prayers; the scriptures lied: "The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much" - NOT! "The prayer of faith shall heal the sick" - NOT! And I began to stop forcing myself to accept that every bad thing that happened to me was God's will for my life: "count it all joy when you fall into diverse temptations

sent in by Lena It’s time I proclaim my atheism, as I once proclaimed my “salvation”. Christianity came and went in my teens; I was greatly disappointed in the church after receiving judgment from the elders and a pastor in the church I attended. The issue is far too sensitive for me to talk about (I made bad choices because of previous abuse as a child. The judgment from those elders was to not speak to me nor reply to my “hello”). As I look back, if those people in this church had studied psychology and human nature, there wouldn’t have been much room to judge. The more we know about human nature and the psyche, the less prone we are to judge. A child who never received love in a home will seek out love from any adult, or any child their own age and “do the wrong thing to receive that affection”. Psychology knows this, the Christian generally doesn’t. It’s all about reading the Bible only, and very little about “real life”. Now many years down the road after simply letting go of anyt

sent in by Truth Seeker Before I get into my own personal de-conversion story, please indulge me in giving just a little background on my life. Not that my former life as a fundamentalist is that much different than any of the other ex-fundies who post here, because I have found that, as a general rule, most ex-fundamentalist share many of the same experiences. Nevertheless, I feel as if the reader deserves some background of my own fundamentalism, even if it’s a condensed version. I was born into fundamentalism. My mother was raised a Missionary Baptist in northeast Mississippi. For those of you who might not know anything about Baptist denominations, this particular “brand” of missionary Baptist is an off shoot of southern Baptist, with almost no discernable differences, other than being a touch more conservative and dogmatic. My mother made sure that my sister and I were in Sunday school and church every Sunday morning, every Sunday night, every Wednesday night, and pretty much ever

sent in by SwissMiss Firstly, I'd like to congratulate the owner of this Website for a very thought-provoking read and for providing this resource for people like me. This is my "testimony": I was born into a church-going family, my parents belonged to the Salvation Army but it was definitely more my father's "thing" than my mother's since she was always more rebellious by nature (she grew up in an incredibly strict Lutheran family) which makes my "conversion" all the more incongruous. When I was a few days past my 9th birthday, my father dragged me and the rest of my family to a tent crusade which had been pitched at a local park; he had been attending the meetings and was keen to see his family do likewise. On this fateful evening, the preacher announced that he had a "Word of Knowledge" about someone in the congregation (my mother[!], apparently) and that that person was invited forward to give their heart to the Lord. I never did

sent in by AndrewT I am at the Crossroads. I am about to make a turn, which will completely change my life in a new direction. This new path, I take, has not been traversed by many, but I am willing to take the risks to see what awaits me. My heart pounds with anticipation and anxiety as I search for signs or clues as to what lies ahead. I see several and they all seem to give me fortitude. I turn back one more time and I see that I am leaving behind most of my friends and family who plan to stay on the same path that has been traveled for 2000 years. I now see that a few of my friends and several strangers have already made the turn. This is the path to TRUTH and REASON. My head is now clear as I take my first few steps in this new direction. I feel a sense of liberation, for I have now shed my fears and confusions that have chained me for 38 years. My new journey has just begun. I have now renounced Christianity. Plano TX USA How old were you when you became a christian? since childh

sent in by Derek Well my story begins much like everyone else’s; I was brought up in a catholic church to begin with until I was about 11. Then one day my mother decided to take us to a Pentecostal church because she liked the atmosphere and the friendly nature of the people who went there. Unlike the Catholic Church we had previously attended. Anyways I would attend church Thursday, Saturday bible study, Sunday morning service and Sunday night service and I was an Active member of youth group until about 19 years of age. I had always been raised thinking that the Bible was the "True Word of God" and that it was infallible. I read the Bible day in a day out believing that Jesus was truly the son of God and that he died for my sins. I would argue with kids in school who didn't believe or kids who called me a bible thumper but I didn't care I stood by my beliefs. Well as time passed I slowly stopped attending church but continued to pray and read the Bible. I had accept

sent in by Jim Thanks for the many, and extremely bright, people at this web site who take the time to encourage those who are struggling to see. Really see. Just as a way of encouragement (if it in fact is), let me say I really bit into the apple. I have three theological degrees, all from very expensive schools, I am a Christian pastor, but now have no reason at all to believe. In other words, I now have a mid-life crisis the kind of which I never, ever envisioned. It's true I used to say that if belief in God were shown to be less viable than non-belief, I would choose the latter. The thing is, I really meant it. But never for a moment thought it could be possible. On the other hand, even while I say this, I think at some strata of the sub-conscious I always held reservations. I was one of those people who wanted to believe all I was told about God, faith, etc. I can remember even sharing with an Unitarian Universalist friend all about my miraculous, mystical experiences. Includ

sent in by Moses Kim I was born a christian and went to church as long as I can remember and I still go to church, not because that I still have faith but because I don't want to cause trouble. Until my mid-twenties, I didn't have any feelings against christianity and there was time I participated in a lot of church activities. I really didn't think deeply about religion and didn't read much of the bible. The only bible story I knew was from church. Then as I got older and became independent from my parents, I started to attend various other church. That time, I realized that many people had different ways of believing, according to which church they go. I started having conversation with them and became more open minded. Their way a belief had their own logic and seemed nice. I came to think that their is no absolute right way of believing god. However, what was disappointing is that most of strong believers claimed that their way is the 'right' way and others

sent in by Deb A thick Southern Baptist reference book and Bible study guide published in 1914 and belonging to an elderly relative had an honored place in our living room bookshelf when I was a child. It had the most fascinating drawings of floating cities, Jesus cruising around in the sky, men and angels wrestling, devils playing chess with humans (and their souls were the prize if they lost), and Armageddon. This was one of my mother's books, which I still have today. At the age of 9 I would entertain myself looking at the drawings and marvel at them. Did grown men and women really believe such fantastic things as floating cities and devils? I certainly had a very hard time doing so. My father explained that it was nonsense and not to worry about it. The other thick book that was so important to me was Dad's "The Fossil Book" by Mildred Adams Fenton and Carroll Lane Fenton. It, too, had fascinating line drawings. But these were drawings of animals and pl

sent in by Kevin I don't want to mention which faith I belonged to or where I come from because believers might say my loss of faith was the result of practicing the wrong religion, so I would prefer they remain in the dark. Let me start by saying I didn't choose to be an Ex-Christian. It just happened. I tried to stop it but I couldn't. I tried hard to fight off the doubts and questions but I wasn't able. My faith started to unravel when I was 16. Like all Christians, I committed my share of sins and like all Christians I prayed for forgiveness and knew my belief in Jesus would save me from myself. I had a good friend whose good Christian father left for another woman and a good Christian judge didn't require him to pay much in alimony or child support. As a result, my friend's mother was always struggling financially. One day, she left two hundred dollars in twenties in the kitchen to pay a debt to someone. My friend stole the money and then helped his frantic

sent in by Mike I've been doing some thinking lately about the meaning of life. A pretty heady subject, to be sure. Most xians seem to feel that a life without a god is a life without meaning. But the mindset that life's meaning comes only from subservience to a god figure seems utterly bleak to me. What kind of meaning would my life have if I believed that I was placed on Earth, along with everyone else, to serve the ego of some mysterious supernatural superbeing? Should I be happy to be the plaything of such a god, to be used and abused as he sees fit? Can a life be said to have true meaning if everything is predetermined by an omniscient deity? Wouldn't that just be play-acting? It strikes me that my life--without any god figures--is actually far more meaningful. I live my life based on decisions that I reach through an intellectual process. I work hard for myself and for those I love. My successes are my own, and I can rightly enjoy them and be proud of them. My failure

sent in by Richard Long ago I can remember a place in my life when I was happy and content with who I was and what my life was all about. I can remember having the warm, peaceful feeling in my life that religions of all forms promise when they tell you that they have something surreal and otherworldly to offer. I can remember, as a child being ecstatic to wake up and go to church because of Jesus what I could learn to be more like him. That was then, when troubles seemed to be a world away and life was truly an adventure. Now as I sit here and write to those whom take enough pity on me to read this I tell you of a completely different me. As a child I was a valiant Christian. I was on fire. I felt deeply that there was a plan for my life and that I was going to make a difference for the sake of the kingdom of God. I can remember going to visitation on Saturday mornings and knocking on the doors of perfect strangers and try my hardest to get them to commit to Jesus and give thi