The Lonely Discourse of a Frustrated Agnostic (I Think)

sent in by Smaugfrost

I am a recent deconvert (last day or so) but have been in the transition for years. I will not bore everyone with the years of unquestioning servitude to this religion. I am not erudite in writing out my feelings yet, but suffice it to say, I was driven from the teachings of my faith by the teachings of my faith.

My case is simple:

Christianity presents the following dogma.

1.The path to destruction is wide according to the bible.

2.Paganism is an anathema to god and admonished as evil.

3.No-one comes to the father except through the son.

4.Hell awaits the sinner and Heaven the believer.

5.God is constant and unchanging.

6.Sin requires a blood sacrifice to be made for attonement.

7.Graven images are sinful.

8.No man is to be called father except god.

My dilemma started years ago and grew until I could no longer accept the faith. My doubts stemmed from the following issues among countless others: (check these in reference to the above doctrines)

1.the exclusive nature of the gospels states most humans will perish rather then be saved. Survival of the eternal soul is virtually impossible according to the bible. Stated then the bible is not a guarantee of safety, right?

2.the church accepts Christmas, Easter and Lent as well as the Catholic church acceptance of All Saints Day. These are all ancient pagan holidays adopted by Christendom to aid the conversion of heathens. other religions or denomination can be saved except the "proper" one. Minor doctrinal differences exist between denominations such as once saved always saved and the necessity of water baptism for salvation. Which ones are right?

4.the doctrine of the grave of the old testament was supplanted by the fiery furnace of hell. Was hell constructed when god decided to burn sinners rather then simply annihilate them in the grave? is the modern god able to stand the sinners of this day in the church who have accepted all manner of pagan roots and beliefs. False prophets are unquestionable and church leaders are beyond reproach and the fear of wrath is laid upon any who would question them. But god stated his people should not persish fo lack of knowledge and should use discernment in all things to test its validity.

6.Jesus died, spilling blood for all sin but the wages of sin is still death. What changed exactly? Jesus forgives. God forgives. We sin and fail and die in eternal torment still. "Yeah, It is hot down here in perdition, but at least I was forgiven."

7.Again, what about the Jesus Fish, the Cross, and Virgin Mary. No images of heavenly or wordly things was to be crafted. Or fish for that matter.

8.Churches have adopted the following titles:

Padre(Father), Pope(papa), and Father in dealing specifically with their leaders.

My personal dilemma of doubt resulted from this viscious circle of circumlocutionary dogma.

me: I want to understand god and have read the bible several times but I have only contradictions and questions.

christian: You will only understand the bible with the gifts of discernment from the holy spirit.

me: How do I receive that? I have been baptised in water and have asked for the spirit as well.

christian: You must pursue god with all your heart and soul and you will recieve these things.

me: Pursue god how?

christian: You need to read the bible of course!


Thanks for hearing my rambles and god bless! (Kidding)


Joined at: 10
Left at: 36
Was: Charismatic Protestant
Now: Ethical Realist, Radical Cynicist
Converted because: Fire Prevention Insurance
De-converted because: Impossible to afford the premiums on the fire insurance
email: smaugfrost1 at yahoo dot com

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