sent in by Frank Sims I wish I could remember my very first experience with Christianity. I was raised Catholic, but shortly after my eleventh birthday my family slowly drifted from the church and its teachings. My mother was a proud believer, but my father oscillated from a believer to an agnostic. The general lifestyle of our household was mostly secular. Early Doubts I’m going to tell you up front that I had a lot of doubts about Christianity – even as a young boy. I didn’t tell anyone; though my mom might have picked up on this when we occasionally would tangle in a theological discussion. The discussion, such as it was, usually ended with the statement that I should believe because anything else was simply inappropriate. I remember the day I engaged my Catholic fourth-grade teacher in a small debate about tenability of Adam and Eve and early creation. Since this was a Christian school it ended quietly with a note sent home to my mother. Upon leaving my home for the Navy at age sev...

sent in by Frank Sims I wish I could remember my very first experience with Christianity. I was raised Catholic, but shortly after my eleventh birthday my family slowly drifted from the church and its teachings. My mother was a proud believer, but my father oscillated from a believer to an agnostic. The general lifestyle of our household was mostly secular. Early Doubts I’m going to tell you up front that I had a lot of doubts about Christianity – even as a young boy. I didn’t tell anyone; though my mom might have picked up on this when we occasionally would tangle in a theological discussion. The discussion, such as it was, usually ended with the statement that I should believe because anything else was simply inappropriate. I remember the day I engaged my Catholic fourth-grade teacher in a small debate about tenability of Adam and Eve and early creation. Since this was a Christian school it ended quietly with a note sent home to my mother. Upon leaving my home for the Navy at age sev...

sent in by undeceived12 I was 16 when I went to this church which was supposed to be a church that helped and provided spiritual support to people who didn’t have it. It all went well (at first). I received Jesus and like a little kid I started to follow a life that not only was a very hard life to live, but an almost impossible one. I read my bible, prayed, and had a relationship with God, or so I thought. I imagined that my walk in the path to Jesus was going well until I started to see some things that were going on in the church. I saw many things that led me to believe that the pastors were stealing from the people, but as a good Christian, I kept my mouth shut. More and more I was convinced that the pastors were only looking for money. As the weeks went by the preacher would ask for money every single week, on top of the ten percent supposedly established by God. Right… Well, he (the pastor) made up tons of excuse: the church needs funds to pay this...to pay that… People, includi...

sent in by undeceived12 I was 16 when I went to this church which was supposed to be a church that helped and provided spiritual support to people who didn’t have it. It all went well (at first). I received Jesus and like a little kid I started to follow a life that not only was a very hard life to live, but an almost impossible one. I read my bible, prayed, and had a relationship with God, or so I thought. I imagined that my walk in the path to Jesus was going well until I started to see some things that were going on in the church. I saw many things that led me to believe that the pastors were stealing from the people, but as a good Christian, I kept my mouth shut. More and more I was convinced that the pastors were only looking for money. As the weeks went by the preacher would ask for money every single week, on top of the ten percent supposedly established by God. Right… Well, he (the pastor) made up tons of excuse: the church needs funds to pay this...to pay that… People, includi...

sent in by Chris Twenty years ago, when I was 15 years old, I was struggling terribly with my sexuality. I realized that I was gay about three years earlier, and I totally freaked out. I was depressed and suicidal. At about that time, I had the misfortune of seeing Jimmy Swaggart on television. I ordered his religious magazine, The Evengelist. When it arrived, I read an article in which he said, "All a homosexual needs to do is accept Jesus Christ as his savior and he will no longer be a homosexual." I was a gullible, naive 15-year old, so I was thrilled to find the antidote to my unwanted sexuality. Remember, this was in 1985. It seems so recent, but things were much different then than they are today. Today, at least people talk about sexuality. But 20 years ago, people rarely spoke about these things at all. Telling someone that you were gay could be an admission greeted with shock, anger or even a fist to the nose. I desperately wanted to change my sexuality. T...

sent in by Chris Twenty years ago, when I was 15 years old, I was struggling terribly with my sexuality. I realized that I was gay about three years earlier, and I totally freaked out. I was depressed and suicidal. At about that time, I had the misfortune of seeing Jimmy Swaggart on television. I ordered his religious magazine, The Evengelist. When it arrived, I read an article in which he said, "All a homosexual needs to do is accept Jesus Christ as his savior and he will no longer be a homosexual." I was a gullible, naive 15-year old, so I was thrilled to find the antidote to my unwanted sexuality. Remember, this was in 1985. It seems so recent, but things were much different then than they are today. Today, at least people talk about sexuality. But 20 years ago, people rarely spoke about these things at all. Telling someone that you were gay could be an admission greeted with shock, anger or even a fist to the nose. I desperately wanted to change my sexuality. T...

sent in by Steve I've read many of the books by Peter Gomes and John Shelby Spong. Their terrific books and writings have been very helpful in appreciating the good things about Christianity. I highly recommend their writings. I love Jesus the man, the human, the carpenter's son, for his ethical teachings of compassion, forgiveness, love and living life abundantly. His teaching are like Filet Mignon! I enjoy some hymns and occasionally meditations and quiet times within a church setting. I appreciate ministers who are wonderful communicators and orators who convey the gospel of peace and love. I'm more of a social, liberal gospel person --- caring and helping the least among us, those who are hurt, sick, lonely, sad, hungry, homeless and suffering. And the other versions of Christianity are often an anathema to my decorum! (think Pat Robertson, Jerry Falwell, James Dobson, Ralph Reed, Gary Bauer, Oral Roberts, Jim Bakker, charlatans, hypocrites and assorted kooks galore!, e...

sent in by Steve I've read many of the books by Peter Gomes and John Shelby Spong. Their terrific books and writings have been very helpful in appreciating the good things about Christianity. I highly recommend their writings. I love Jesus the man, the human, the carpenter's son, for his ethical teachings of compassion, forgiveness, love and living life abundantly. His teaching are like Filet Mignon! I enjoy some hymns and occasionally meditations and quiet times within a church setting. I appreciate ministers who are wonderful communicators and orators who convey the gospel of peace and love. I'm more of a social, liberal gospel person --- caring and helping the least among us, those who are hurt, sick, lonely, sad, hungry, homeless and suffering. And the other versions of Christianity are often an anathema to my decorum! (think Pat Robertson, Jerry Falwell, James Dobson, Ralph Reed, Gary Bauer, Oral Roberts, Jim Bakker, charlatans, hypocrites and assorted kooks galore!, e...

sent in by Anonymous When I was little, I can remember my Mom telling me that it was a “miracle” that I survived birth. Being born two months premature provided little hope for my family. She even said, “God must have a reason for you to be here.” There was little question in my mind as to whether there was a God. Of course there was. He was responsible for me surviving as a baby. If Mom hadn’t prayed and asked others to, I wouldn’t have made it. We only went to church together as a family a few times. It was to a rather evangelical protestant one. Even from a young age, I had my doubts. I found it odd that a woman in attendance could not only speak to God, but also hear what he had to say. There was even a time where I yelled during Holy Communion, “You’re not supposed to drink blood!” The next time we went to church, my Dad whipped me before we went in, “just in case I did anything bad.” At least seven or eight years passed before I regularly went to church again. However,...

sent in by Anonymous When I was little, I can remember my Mom telling me that it was a “miracle” that I survived birth. Being born two months premature provided little hope for my family. She even said, “God must have a reason for you to be here.” There was little question in my mind as to whether there was a God. Of course there was. He was responsible for me surviving as a baby. If Mom hadn’t prayed and asked others to, I wouldn’t have made it. We only went to church together as a family a few times. It was to a rather evangelical protestant one. Even from a young age, I had my doubts. I found it odd that a woman in attendance could not only speak to God, but also hear what he had to say. There was even a time where I yelled during Holy Communion, “You’re not supposed to drink blood!” The next time we went to church, my Dad whipped me before we went in, “just in case I did anything bad.” At least seven or eight years passed before I regularly went to church again. However,...

sent in by Mark Fouche Well....where should I start? Like all Christian cliché stories I will start by saying that I was brought up in a Christian home, Christian family and Christian community. Now my whole life I believed in Christianity as being the way....yet never really thought about it or had the "revelation" ceasing my heart and convicting me to turn to God. I had dabbled in witchcraft and the occult and was always interested in that which was unknown. Now my whole life I had suffered rejection in some sort of sense and I remember crying myself to sleep at night when I was younger praying to God to just kill me, or for Jesus to help me as I felt so alone.yet my prayers were never answered. I carried on through life almost committing suicide at the age of 11 or 12. Things got better until at the age of sixteen I lost almost all my friends by something i did. This drove me into depression and loneliness, I became "broken". I started going to a youth and was en...

sent in by Mark Fouche Well....where should I start? Like all Christian cliché stories I will start by saying that I was brought up in a Christian home, Christian family and Christian community. Now my whole life I believed in Christianity as being the way....yet never really thought about it or had the "revelation" ceasing my heart and convicting me to turn to God. I had dabbled in witchcraft and the occult and was always interested in that which was unknown. Now my whole life I had suffered rejection in some sort of sense and I remember crying myself to sleep at night when I was younger praying to God to just kill me, or for Jesus to help me as I felt so alone.yet my prayers were never answered. I carried on through life almost committing suicide at the age of 11 or 12. Things got better until at the age of sixteen I lost almost all my friends by something i did. This drove me into depression and loneliness, I became "broken". I started going to a youth and was en...

sent in by Kevin Why did I loose my faith? To be honest, there was no single reason, no silver bullet that turned me from a serious, bible believing Christian to a self-professing agnostic/atheist. My faith struggle took place over a period of three years, and was the result of many different reasons. I will cover some of them in later posts, but one of the main causes can be summed up by a quote in Philip Yancey’s Disappointment With God. Yancey recounts the true story of Richard, a young Christian writer who looses his faith after a long and painful struggle with his belief. Yancey records Richard as saying: “How can you have a personal relationship if you’re not sure the other person even exists?” This was the exact problem I had – dealing with a hidden friend. I started to slide from my faith when I realised that although I was talking a lot to God, I wasn’t hearing much in reply. As a believer, I was expected to share my all with God, every thought and desire; but in return he did...

sent in by Kevin Why did I loose my faith? To be honest, there was no single reason, no silver bullet that turned me from a serious, bible believing Christian to a self-professing agnostic/atheist. My faith struggle took place over a period of three years, and was the result of many different reasons. I will cover some of them in later posts, but one of the main causes can be summed up by a quote in Philip Yancey’s Disappointment With God. Yancey recounts the true story of Richard, a young Christian writer who looses his faith after a long and painful struggle with his belief. Yancey records Richard as saying: “How can you have a personal relationship if you’re not sure the other person even exists?” This was the exact problem I had – dealing with a hidden friend. I started to slide from my faith when I realised that although I was talking a lot to God, I wasn’t hearing much in reply. As a believer, I was expected to share my all with God, every thought and desire; but in return he did...

sent in by TWJ Just thought I'd add my two cents. My father was a conservative, fundamentalist minister who is well known to many in the mid-west. I remember when I was first questioning my faith and I wished I could just hear about someone like me who had left his or her faith. It wasn't easy at first, but has become much easier and more comfortable as time passes. I'm 45 now and have a lovely wife and family. I found that leaving my parents, extended family and friends to live in other states helped make leaving "the faith" much less painful. It can be difficult at first, but it can be done successfully. I'd recommend that if you're a young person who is a "free thinker", if you've found the courage to admit that no one knows if there is a God or not, just keep it to yourself. This is particularly true for PKs (preacher's kids) and MKs (missionary's kids). Don't let people know that you're a non-believer until you can aff...

sent in by TWJ Just thought I'd add my two cents. My father was a conservative, fundamentalist minister who is well known to many in the mid-west. I remember when I was first questioning my faith and I wished I could just hear about someone like me who had left his or her faith. It wasn't easy at first, but has become much easier and more comfortable as time passes. I'm 45 now and have a lovely wife and family. I found that leaving my parents, extended family and friends to live in other states helped make leaving "the faith" much less painful. It can be difficult at first, but it can be done successfully. I'd recommend that if you're a young person who is a "free thinker", if you've found the courage to admit that no one knows if there is a God or not, just keep it to yourself. This is particularly true for PKs (preacher's kids) and MKs (missionary's kids). Don't let people know that you're a non-believer until you can aff...

sent in by Deborah Religion sucks... All "my life" (it's never been my fuckin' life) I've been told what a heathen I am. Daddy told me Charles Mansons' followers were going to heaven, but I wasn't. I was 15 then. Pretty scary stuff. So I repented & joined his church {Beth Yeshua-NY}. There I was treated to old men sticking their tongues down my throat [in front of their wives & all God's other children!]. I told Daddy but he said I was lying. My younger brother was seduced by Gaye, a "woman of God" who loved to show us photos of her life before she got "saved." Then there was Michelle. the teen w/the huge tits who regularly spent nights at the pastor's house. Hmmm... I guess I owe Gaye this much: she said I could masterbate; Michelle said God would punish me. At 15 I gave up sex, friends, drinking,...everything I knew! But it wasn't enough for them... Mom (her name is Virginia--it's hard to call a woman who r...

sent in by Deborah Religion sucks... All "my life" (it's never been my fuckin' life) I've been told what a heathen I am. Daddy told me Charles Mansons' followers were going to heaven, but I wasn't. I was 15 then. Pretty scary stuff. So I repented & joined his church {Beth Yeshua-NY}. There I was treated to old men sticking their tongues down my throat [in front of their wives & all God's other children!]. I told Daddy but he said I was lying. My younger brother was seduced by Gaye, a "woman of God" who loved to show us photos of her life before she got "saved." Then there was Michelle. the teen w/the huge tits who regularly spent nights at the pastor's house. Hmmm... I guess I owe Gaye this much: she said I could masterbate; Michelle said God would punish me. At 15 I gave up sex, friends, drinking,...everything I knew! But it wasn't enough for them... Mom (her name is Virginia--it's hard to call a woman who r...

sent in by "just me" I have been lurking on this site for over a year. It has brought out many emotions...anger (over the past), resentment of wasting precious years, laughter at how many of the posts express various ways of dealing with "the Borg" and many fun laughs. So, I thought I should finally chime in. Be Warned! Once I get started I usually can't keep my mouth shut -- One of the reasons why I am an xtian. Well here it goes. My apologies to those whom I bore. Also, please do not misconstrue my message. I am not angry (anymore) with anyone in my family concerning my upbringing. After all, they too are hoodwinked by the Big Ugly. At the tender age of 5 days old, my parents placed me on the alter at my fathers church (he was the pastor and founder) and "turned me over to god (they didn't specify which one??). It was the "fire and brimstone" type of church that frightened people into pissing their panties. Thus was the main reaso...

sent in by "just me" I have been lurking on this site for over a year. It has brought out many emotions...anger (over the past), resentment of wasting precious years, laughter at how many of the posts express various ways of dealing with "the Borg" and many fun laughs. So, I thought I should finally chime in. Be Warned! Once I get started I usually can't keep my mouth shut -- One of the reasons why I am an xtian. Well here it goes. My apologies to those whom I bore. Also, please do not misconstrue my message. I am not angry (anymore) with anyone in my family concerning my upbringing. After all, they too are hoodwinked by the Big Ugly. At the tender age of 5 days old, my parents placed me on the alter at my fathers church (he was the pastor and founder) and "turned me over to god (they didn't specify which one??). It was the "fire and brimstone" type of church that frightened people into pissing their panties. Thus was the main reaso...