By Diane I began to listen to what I knew inside instead of what the authorities told me I should know. My experience with Christianity started when I was very young, perhaps five or six years old. My father made the decision to attend a Reformed Baptist church. He came from a Catholic background, and had been turned off of religion for quite a long time. I think this new church attracted him because the pastor was a stern authoritarian, and the pattern of sitting under him and, in turn, transferring the anger, sternness, and rules to his family appealed to his nature. The strongest memory I have of this church was sitting in the pews in extreme terror because the pastor often shouted during sermons. Such fury was overwhelming to my shy, sensitive psyche. The bullying had begun. When I was eight, we moved and started attended a church that felt the need to continually entertain us and provide us with incentives to keep coming such as contests and special events. Even amongst ...

by Amanda I was "saved" when I was seven years old. My mother was always a very religious woman, and like most people who are converted, she was going through a bad time in her life. She grabbed fundamentalist Christianity with both hands and held on for dear life. I spent the first 5 years of my life "on fire for God," as they say in the church. But as I grew into an adolescent girl, I began to resent the way the church had mapped out my future as a woman- don't worry about education, darling, you've got cookies to bake. I wistfully looked out the window at the boys youth group, wrestling, playing basketball, etc., while I was stuck inside, being taught how to deny my feelings and wants. When I was 12, it was discovered that the very married Pastor of our church had sexually abused at least 5 women over a period of years. With all the women, it had taken place during counseling, when each one of the women was in a devastating po...

By Cynthia After having to really explain my beliefs for the first time, I was shocked to find myself thinking, I believe THAT? My grandmother had been a fundamentalist since a conversion experience in her early twenties (before which she claimed to have drunk and "cussed like a sailor"-which I could never quite bring myself to believe). She always claimed that she "loved children," while being completely heartless and unloving with me; but I think she would have been a cruel person with or without her religious beliefs. Somehow, my mother had grown up to be a loving, kind, compassionate and open-minded individual in spite of her own mother's influence. My father was never a Christian, but he saw no reason to make an issue of his lack of belief, even though my grandmother felt the need to try to evangelize him-and absolutely every stranger she met-at every possible opportunity. Fortunately for me, he got a job in Southeast Asia and my family lived in ...

By Ian J. Carr If I may paraphrase a famous Christian: Free at last, thank God I'm free at last! I am a former Christian, early 40's, a previous true believer who worshipped mainly in Fundamentalist circles (though never able to tackle hard-line evangelist doctrine with any enthusiasm.) My journey to freethought has taken five years, and I would now describe myself as an "open" nontheist. That is, I am happy to describe the human being as "spiritual", while realising that this impetus is a phenomenon manufactured within the psyche or society, and not imposed by an external God (especially not the white-bearded guy looking down from the clouds!) And I am willing to accept the positive, beautiful and poetic elements of any faith while resisting any attempts by organized religion to impose their dogmas on our (thankfully) secular society. My personal consolations are now the music of Bach, Mozart and Grainger, the poetry of Housman and Wilfred Owen, ...

by Mike McClellan The Questions What was your "born-again" and spiritual experience? What caused you to leave the born again fundamentalist religious persuasion? What were the questions you had? Are those the only questions? Perhaps they can be explained How does one "discern" the "things of the spirit" as taught by most born again Christians? Where has your quest for spiritual truth led you? Why don't you forget about logic and knowledge? Just place your faith in God and His Word What are your spiritual beliefs now? Any advice for those who have similar feelings and questions? -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- What was your 'born-again' and spiritual experience? I was saved' in 1960 after my father died. His death brought home the fact that one day we all face death. I was devastated by his loss and began to be concerned about my own soul. I had an intense interes...

OPENING NOTE: It’s important that I note a couple of things about my family and myself because it says a lot of how I came to freethought. The first is that though my mother is very much into the Lord, she is the one who ultimately gave me the gift of skepticism. She has never believed in palm readers, fortune tellers or anything of the sort and always obliged me the opportunity to research what it is that I believe in before I chose it. She has never forced me nor my siblings to accept anything that we didn’t wish to accept. She never browbeat me with a bible and scripture; it was just a silent way of life for us. She does believe that churchgoers are on the high end of moral values and encourages Sunday worship and works in the church as a way of life. She is a BIG BELIEVER IN THIS! (I can understand that) I don’t think that she would be all of that surprised to hear where I am right now. Hurt, but not surprised. They expect anything from me. The second thing is that I have be...

I don't remember the exact time I lost my faith. I am sure many reformed Christians can give you a date but with me, it was a process and a very slow one at that. As early as I can remember I went to church, I stared vacantly at Sunday school teachers every morning and let my mind wander. My mother dragged my brother Grant and I to just about every Presbyterian Church in this city trying to find a church that was "Right for her." I can't even remember most of the churches names but I have lots of memories of playing with other children at church functions and gatherings. As a young child I was never concerned with god or Jesus, I believed in them but I never really gave them much thought... As much as I believed in god and Jesus, I hated church with a passion. I used to hide under my covers when I was little and hope my mother had overslept and I would have the incredible good fortune to spend my Sunday morning watching cartoons. In my mind I have dozens and dozens of...