no more in the god gang

sent in by skype uk

well, here goes folk...I got religion when I was 16 yrs old.To say that I was a mixed up teenager would be an under statement and I was easy prey for street evangelists.To cut a long story short i got converted into pentecostalism.My elation at having been "saved" and found the truth was short lived.I made a dreadful mistake...i started to read the bible for myself.

what an eye opener. what i was been told (indoctrinated with) was at odds with the bible itself."God loves everyone and died for them" i was told and yet I read of god killing people relentlessly.Week after week and bible study after bible study i was told that the bible is infallable and yet i couldnt reconcile the contradictions within its pages.The more i read the more i questioned and the more I questioned the more annoyed the elders got with me until eventually they suspended me from the church for three months "for being negative".And still i went back,such was my desire to believe.

However my inquisitive nature would not be quelled and I continued to research.I read voraciously.I read everything that I could get my hands on regarding religion and christianity.My church started to ostracise me,they didnt like difficult questions,they preffered their nice little religious comfort blanket.I wanted answers.

I WANTED to believe but I also wanted to keep my brain intact.If the bible was true then surley my doubts could be answered.I next joined a more radical christian group and for a while lived in one of their communal houses.They had an "every thing in common" type of christianity.They were certainly more sincere than most other christians that I knew but also (looking back)more brainwashed.Absolutly nothing was questioned.If the elders had said hit yourselves on the head repeatedly with a large iron chisel they would have done it.

needless to say my doubts grew and I eventualy drifted away.

Now, at forty years of age, I look back upon those days as though they happened to somebody else.Gone is the constant fear of hellfire,gone are the doubts and the never ending task of trying to reconcile biblical contradictions,gone are the brothers and sisters who shunned me because i wanted answers to questions.nowadays i can see christianity, the bible and religion for what it is...a croc of crap

stoke on trent
england
joined at sixteen
driffted away in my twenties
was: pentecostal and a home grown jesus cult
now: agnostic skeptic freethinker
converted because: evangelised in the street (& fell for it)
de-converted because: read the bible & saw it for what it is
email: dundana dot 66 at virgin dot net