sent in by BeMuseMe I was born in the peak year of the baby boom way down south and half way west in BIG D near ground zero of the Military Industrial Republic of Texas. My father was a Constable On Patrol from exactly the day before I was born. He was just a big ole country boy off the farm in the big bad sinful city with his sweetly naive teen bride at his side. I am sure I was in church by the time I was a week old. In those early years church amounted to playing with others kids. I was exposed to both the city life and country life. My grand parents on both sides were southern baptist and there I got that old time bible thumpin off key singing fire and brimstone style religion. While back in the city it was a bit more laid back liberal free wheeling just say no gimme a hug see ya in church? kinda show. It was just a part of my life that I payed little attention to. I was loved and the wonderous world was mine. As I became more self aware and less secure ...

sent in by Maureen Perez I hope I'm on the right site for me. I was baptized Methodist, spent childhood in Pentecostal faith, converted to Catholic as an adult, and now I consider myself to be spiritual but anti-religious. Back in the '70's when I was 12, my mom got interested in Astrology and joined a psychic circle. She occasionally took me with her and I enjoyed it alot. I started reading a lot of books...Edgar Cayce and others based on reincarnation, etc. Every week my and my girlfriend would scan the bible for scriptures that disagreed with our Youth Group discussions. We enjoyed asking forbidden questions. We were both kicked out of church by the pastor because we "dared" to question the sincerity of some idiot evangelist named Katherine Kuhlman that the church believed was legit. The paper said she was being investigated for tax evasion, lived in a mansion, had a fleet of rolls royces, etc. I asked my teacher" how com...

sent in by LostInTranslation I actually left the church three years ago, but it is really only now that I am beginning to say that I am an ex-Christian. I became saved at the end of my junior year at college. I had a traumatic break-up with my first boyfriend, and was comforted by my best friend, who over the past year had begun to hang out more and more with Inter Varsity Christian Fellowship. She prayed for me, her friends prayed for me. I was very moved by the experience. I also had very low self-esteem and experienced emotional neglect from my parents. I thought, “How could someone who doesn’t know me care that much to prayer for me, a stranger?” My heart, which was hardened by years of Catholic school, started to “soften”. I began hanging out with her friends and began going to church with her. I saw the Jesus movie. I cried so much to the worship songs. People seemed so happy. Eventually I became saved one Sunday morning. In retrospect, this particular group...

sent in by Kevin I’ve been reading Marlene Winnell’s book “Leaving the Fold.” She makes a very good point, namely that the doctrine of original sin as taught by evangelicals/fundamentalists is a source of tremendous psychological harm. As a counseling intern, I could not agree more. I had become a Christian at the age of 18 largely because of extreme psychological stress that I was experiencing in my life at the time. My parents had split up, I was living in a fifth wheel trailer while my dad was reliving a sort of second childhood, and my entry into active duty with the Air Force was on the horizon. My family life was at an all time low, and I now believe that I was searching for something to replace my family. Too bad that the “Borg” came along! I was taught by Calvary Chapel that I was inherently evil. I was worthless and that only by filling my sinful self with the love of Christ could I become whole. Once I did that, I was constantly reminded that my “fles...

sent in by Anonymous I am not sure where to start this tale. Perhaps the best place to start should be around third grade. Although I went to a public elementary school, one night a week, I went to religious education at the local church. Many of my friends from school were there as well, so it wasn’t a very big deal. A few years of this, I was trying to stay home more and more. I would hide away, until it was too late to attend. The classes were taught my mean old church ladies (Dana Carvey’s impression was dead-on) and teenage boys from the local Catholic high school. We weren’t given bibles, instead we were given colored workbooks that paraphrased biblical stories (or so I thought) and showed pictures of Jesus and the apostles fishing, eating, having a good old time talking about their god. There were multiple choice questions at the end of each unit, such as: Which best describes Jesus Christ? A) Wonderful B) Son of God C) The path to true happiness D) A ...

sent in by Sarah My Story: I am the middle child of nine and was born into a strict Southern Baptist family. I attended church three times weekly (Sunday morning, Sunday night, and Wednesday night), attended summer "revival meetings" that seemed endless (only made worse by the horrible potluck dinners), and attended private school (on church grounds). We were not allowed to watch TV, go to the movies (even if it was G rated - simply because someone who sees you go into the theater has no idea if you're going to the Disney movie or the R-rated thriller), drink, smoke, wear large jewelry, wear jeans or shorts (women), dance - you get the idea. My parents did cheat sometimes and we were allowed restricted TV privileges and every once in a while we went to the movies. I used to put blank tapes in my boom box, put the volume all the way down, and record hours of regular radio. I would go for walks or go horseback riding and listen to the evil rock musi...

sent in by Charles This is a letter that I am sending to my Pastor. Searching For Truth Three months ago I was asked what I believed, but I did not get a chance to really answer you. I am writing this letter so I can fully describe the changes I have gone through. It is not enough to say that I am a struggling Christian, I need to share with you all the events this past year, which have shaped my views. I am a curious soul and have always been one. As a child I would take apart every mechanical toy I had to understand how things really worked. I have carried that pursuit with me throughout my life and not much has changed in that regard. My views have evolved more than once, and to some it may even appear as fickleness. Although it is better to change one’s mind then continue in the wrong path. My views and what I believe about Christianity has shifted much because of quarrels between Pastors and Theologians. I began as an Arminian and later became a C...

sent in by Bling_Bling I grew up in the Pentecostal church. Every day, no joke, every day I drove to church my stomach would have nasty butterflies in it as I pulled up into the parking lot. I never figured out why. I endured put downs, ("your just a babe in Christ......".....or some stuff about,"one day you will speak in tongues" to the just plain ignoring) I cannot believe I let my self get drawn into these wackos. I must honestly say: They are in a cult. Yea it doesnt take ALL your money; but the end result is the same. The church led me not to hang out with family as much. The charismatics are nuts. Everything from mind control to those idiots who think non-Pentecostals are going to burn in hell. Do you folks know that Pentecostals officially believe that your not saved unless you speak in tongues ? Thats garbage. One pastor tried to make me recite some mumbo jumbo to fake it. Am I upset ? Yes. AM I STILL BITTER ? YES. (give me 1...

sent in by Marie I grew up believing I was cursed because I didn't have faith. No matter how hard I tried to believe, no matter what I tried, my situation never improved. I envied those around me who could blindly put their faith in god. I wanted and needed someone or something to help me deal with my life. My father, raised in a devout Catholic family, was a pedophile who made my life a living hell. I would tell people later that my father did not believe in god, he believed in hell. While he was engaged in his abuse he would often say he was going to hell anyhow, so he might as well have fun. My mother was not much better. British, and raised in the pseudo-catholic ambiance of the Anglican church, she was violent and given to jealous rages and psychotic breaks. I needed faith to survive in that family, and trust me, I tried. I attended friends' churches and came away even more filled with shame, fear, and a profound sense of loneliness and depression. At various tim...

sent in by Cameron Riddle There has been no point in my life at which I would have called myself an atheist, but a seriously devout interest in all things spiritual is something that has only affected me for the past eight years. This initial interest in spirituality turned into a period of intensive questioning of the nature of God. At the end of 1997, when I was fourteen, and at boarding school, I was invited to attend school Christian Fellowship by some mates of mine. This became the highlight of my week – tea, biscuits, and cake at Bob the rev’s house after a walk across the Bigside playing fields. One would get out of prep early to get there for 9:00pm, and it was a relaxing and friendly way to end Wednesday, away from the institutional austerity of the boarding house. “Bob the Rev.” or alternatively, the Reverend Robert Marsden, the school chaplain, was a man of conservative religious views, and these I challenged with questions he would often fail to answer to any...