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10/12/07                                                                                       View Comments

Christianity taught me...

Sent in by Sharon H

Christianity taught me that I must always forgive. Now I’m learning that while forgiveness is indeed good for the soul, forgiveness is a choice not a mandate. Compassion is more effective than forgiveness, because it involves stepping back and detaching from the tendency to judge.

Christianity taught me that marriage was the second most important goal in life, the first being devotion to God. Now I've learned that marriage is not a goal at all but a formal way of expressing a love relationship between two people.

Christianity taught me that allegiance to one’s life partner is more important than anything—including one's sanity, safety and well being. Now I’m learning that allegiance to self is most important.

Christianity taught me to judge my every feeling, thought, and behavior as morally right or wrong. Now I’m learning that feelings are feelings, thoughts are thoughts, and behaviors are either effective or ineffective.

Christianity taught me to scrutinize myself. Now I’m learning to love myself.

Christianity and its patriarchal system taught me that I was a second class citizen thus setting me up for victimization by those deemed first class.

Christianity taught me to believe in moral absolutes. Now I’m learning the importance of developing and trusting my own set of values.

Christianity taught me intolerance and separatist thinking. Now that I’m freeing myself from these, my mind is opening up to embrace all people.

Christianity taught me to fear hell and to feel guilty. Now it seems my process of recovery from the tyranny of fear and guilt will be life long.

Christianity taught me that good things come only to those who wait. Now I’m learning that I deserve good things regardless of waiting.

Christianity taught me that without god I could do nothing, even parent my children effectively. Now I know I parented my children effectively despite an errant belief system, and given the chance to parent again, I would do so without Christianity's problematic influence.