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Archived Testimonials

5/16/06                                                                                       View Comments

Have I believed a lie?

sent in by Mark

Have I believed a lie for 20 years?

I’ve been debating with my Christian friends for months now, about the bucket-load of inconsistencies, contradictions and atrocities I continue to find when I read the bible. After 20 years as a Christian, I can’t pretend any longer and ignore all the stuff that I’m finding.

I’ve spent hours on apologetics websites, spent pounds on books. I’ve gone to my friends to find out how they dealt with all this stuff. What’s the answer I’ve been met with? “Ignore all the inconsistencies and believe anyway”.

WTF? I thought that Christianity trumpeted itself as the truth, as a belief system with weighty evidence. Yet no-one seems able to tell me why the bible disagrees with itself on literally dozens and dozens of instances. (E.g. Dt 24:16 & 2 Sam 12:14). I even posted a challenge on this website, twice, asking Christians to explain it all. Yet no-one could.

I’m getting really frustrated with the glassy-eyed responses I’m receiving from my friends, when they look at me as if I’m talking a foreign language. I feel like I want to shake them, to get them to see what’s in front of their eyes.

Last night, I showed them a whole bunch of old testament atrocities, and despite all the evidence they refused to call it genocide when God slaughters a whole race, yet they will condemn a human being for the slightest ‘sin’. It seems that God can be called ‘good’ no matter what evil he performs or allows, yet I am a filthy sinner just because of who I am.

I have explored my doubts with honesty and integrity and I feel like I’m on the verge of walking away because the evidence from the bible has come up short. However, I fear that if I do walk away, they’ll rationalise my decision by saying that ‘I left because I wanted to sin/be in the world’ or that ‘I left because someone offended me’. How do you get them to acknowledge the fact that you’re walking away because you explored the evidence and found it lacking?

Birmingham
England
Joined: 18
Left: 40
Was: Evangelical, Fundamentalist
Now: Seriously Doubting
Believed because: Thought it was the truth
Doubting because: Realised it isn't